Chapter One

“Just shut up, Fiona! You’re making me crazy!” Dolph Sanders yelled. The tension in the room was so thick that it could be cut through with a knife. The couple was having one of their many arguments once again. They had enjoyed years of a happy marriage, but now everything was going downhill.

Dolph Sanders rolled his eyes at his wife before turning back to the computer screen before him. His wife, standing at the door with arms akimbo, was undeterred. “You can’t keep running away from your responsibilities, Dolph,” she said. “There are so many bills to pay, and I am tired of sorting them alone. You need a new job, and you know it. I’m not the bad person here – don’t make me out to be one.”

Rage flashed through Fiona’s eyes, but it didn’t convey the pain in her heart. Every time they had this argument, Dolph made her feel like a nagging wife. All she wanted was for Dolph to step up to his responsibilities as a husband and father. Dolph said nothing but continued typing furiously on the keyboard.

“Really, that’s how you want it? Fine!” If he wanted nasty, he was going to get nasty.

The computer turned off without warning. A few seconds passed before Dolph understood what had happened. He spun around quickly to face Fiona. She had a daring look on her face. “Now that I have your attention, I will no longer take care of the water bills or the groceries or anything else. You don’t want to get a new job, fine. I’m done arguing with you.”

“What is wrong with you? Don’t force me to do something stupid,” Dolph said through gritted teeth.

“You mean something you haven’t done already? I am sick and tired of you, Dolph. Get a new job already and sort out the bills like a man. I hardly have any –”

The slam of the door cut her short. Dolph had stormed out. Fiona slumped on the worn-out brown leather seat her husband had stood up from. The exhaustion hit her like a ton of bricks, and she held her head in both hands and sobbed.

As soon as he was outside their bedroom, Dolph released a long breath. What was it with Fiona? She had made it a point of duty to remind him that he wasn’t enough. He loved his job as a furniture maker, but his earnings from O’ner Furniture House were barely enough to cover his family’s upkeep. Fiona had been understanding at first when he lost his better-paying job, and she had taken on another job to help out with the bills. But the ceaseless badgering was getting too much. His patience was running thin, so he had left the room to avoid doing something rash. He had sworn never to hit a woman, but Fiona was relentless.

Dolph Sanders stomped his way to the medium-sized kitchen space in their home. The old coffee maker sat on the wooden countertop. Five minutes after rummaging through the cabinets, the low hum of the machine could be heard in the kitchen.

Twelve-year-old Kiki Sanders opened her door as quietly as she could and tiptoed to the kitchen. Mum and Dad started arguing again about an hour after he came back from work. She peeped through the corridor and found her Dad seated at the dining table at the center of the kitchen, holding his favorite white mug. Tears formed at the corner of her eyes, but she wiped them off quickly and tiptoed back to her room before anyone saw her.

Her parents used to be so happy. She remembered those times clearly – when they laughed together at dinner and slept cuddled together on the king-size bed in their bedroom. She was an only child, and she had been happy. When Jasmine and Roger were born years later, Kiki thought life would go on as usual. But her Dad lost his job, and everything changed.

Back in her bed, Kiki stared at the decorated ceiling. The once shiny stars looked so dim now. Like the angry starless night when, as Dad told her, the stars were angry with the moon and refused to come out. Tears dropped from her eyes again. This time, she didn’t wipe them off. She drew up her Barbie cover to her neck and stared at the dim stars on her ceiling till she gave in to sleep.

The following day, Fiona Sanders continued life as usual. The argument between Dolph and her lay like a wedge at the base of her skull, but she dismissed the thoughts as she prepared the children for school.

“Jasmine! Don’t do that. Keep your lips closed when you chew. Yes, that way. That’s my girl!” she beamed at her youngest daughter. She stretched her arm towards the blue bowl of cereal in front of Roger, her five-year-old son.

“Roger, baby, you are too far from your bowl. Take it closer. Good boy.”

Roger grinned happily. He had cereal spluttered over his nose and had milk dripping from his mouth, all the way to the blue napkin that covered his white underwear.

Kiki swallowed the urge to laugh. Biting her lower lip, she reached for the tip of the napkin and wiped his nose and chin clean.

“Thank you, Kiki,” Fiona smiled in approval. She noticed the small bags beneath her daughter’s eyes but didn’t ask about them. Footsteps echoed from the stairs, and before Dolph came into view, cries of “daddy” filled the air.

“Hey baby, hey big guy... hey princess,” Dolph smiled at each child, ruffling their hairs and plopping a kiss on their foreheads.

Fiona got up and walked to the kitchen sink.

“Dada, dada,” Jasmine called and raised both hands in the air with a toothy grin. Fiona ignored the noise, trying to contain the anger threatening to brim to the surface. Dolph didn’t apologize to her the previous night, and he hadn’t said a word to her that morning. Now he was acting all daddy-like. She took a deep breath and opened the tap, pretending for the children’s sake that she was washing her hands.

By the time she turned back to the dining table, Roger was asking him questions. “Dad, would you drop us at school today? My friends at school get dropped off by their dads.”

“I have to go to work now, baby,” Dolph answered. “Mum will drop you off instead, okay?”

“I was serious about what I said last night, Dolph,” Fiona said curtly before lifting Jasmine in her arms. As usual, Dolph didn’t respond. He focused on Jasmine, who was giggling at the silly sounds he was making with his mouth. Fiona didn’t say anything more and walked up the stairs, setting an ultimatum in her mind. If Dolph called her bluff again, she would fight him.

Later that evening, Roger found his way to Kiki’s bedroom like he did on nights when their parents began their bickering. “Kiki, I can hear mum and Dad downstairs. Are they fighting again?” he asked as he snuggled up to his older sister on her bed.

“I don’t think so, Roger. Perhaps they’re just talking,” Kiki lied. She sighed and put her right arm over him. The blush pink blanket that covered them both felt heavy against her chin, but it kept out the December cold. It made her feel better about lying. She prayed that her parents would stop their argument as she blinked back tears. If Roger saw them, he would start crying too.

Downstairs, Fiona clenched her fists at her sides as she tried to make her husband see reason. Her voice went up a notch as she argued to make her point. “Oh yeah? I’m supposed to be excited? You are planning to whisk us away to someplace in Africa, snatch us away from the life we are used to in the name of a new job, and I am supposed to be excited?”

“Yes, Fiona!” Dolph snapped. “You’re supposed to be happy about my progress. All you do is rant about the bills, my job, how hard you work to supplement my meager income. Could you at least see the bright side?” He sighed deeply, the anger leaving his voice. “Honey, we could have a fresh start. I know this.” He waved his hands, gesticulating towards the room. “This is not what you signed up for. But this move to South Africa will be better,” he said placatingly, holding her by her shoulders and staring deep into her eyes, willing her to see into his heart. He didn’t want them fighting all the time. For once, he wanted her to see that he was doing his best to get them the life they deserved without sacrificing his passion for furniture making. He had only considered moving because of the prospects the new job had for him. They would have a house – the new company was bigger and could afford to provide a house for him. The pay was ten times higher than what he was paid at O’ner. They finally had a chance at having a good life, and Dolph had thought his wife would be more understanding of the situation.

The couple stared at each other for a moment. Just when Dolph thought his wife was softening, she shrugged and backed out of his hold. “No, Dolph. Our life is here. You could barely take care of us here. How do you expect me to believe you would when we move away to another continent?” she said.

Dolph sighed, frustrated. If she wasn’t going to trust him, so be it.

“I am moving to SA, with or without you. The earlier you get used to the idea, the better for everyone,” he said icily. There was no mistaking the finality in his tone. He turned and walked out of the living room.

“Do you even care about your children? Have you considered what this means for them?” Fiona cried desperately after him. Her voice was loud enough to echo around the house, but she was past caring.

Dolph disappeared upstairs without a word, and Fiona slumped on the polished floor and wept. Her husband’s outrageous decision wasn’t all that tore her heart at that moment. It was the look in his eyes when he walked out. It was the kind of look that said he wouldn’t flinch if he had to leave her or their rocky marriage to chase his fantasy in South Africa.